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Like Mother Like Son.
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AshMansMommy Offline
Newbie

Posts: 2
Joined: May 2012
#1
Like Mother Like Son.

Hi everyone I am a 24 year old mother of an amazing almost 3 year old boy.

Im so glad I found this site, much like others on here I have felt very alone and confused with all this new stuff coming my way. Up until recently I thought I had OCD/Anxiety disorders since my childhood. My parents always thought I was being "a drama queen" and doing things for attention and such. It wasn't until I was doing research about SPD for my son did I stopped and considered that I too was affected by SPD.

I have a son who is almost 3 and we just found out he has SPD and it makes me feel so much better knowing Im not crazy, or a bad mother ect. So many people played it off just like my parents did in my childhood and I can't be happier that I took the time and effort to figure out what is up with my son and with myself.

I could really use support and advice because its a lot to get a grip on all at once. I feel as if my SPD rears its ugly head even more now that my son has a lot of the same triggers as myself.

I guess thats all I have to say for now Smile
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beck7422 Offline
Regular

Posts: 342
Joined: Jun 2010
#2
RE: Like Mother Like Son.

Welcome. Do you have any questions about aspects of SPD you need help with?
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Heather Offline
Site Moderator
**

Posts: 117
Joined: Apr 2012
#3
RE: Like Mother Like Son.

Hey there Smile I myself have SPD and so does 2 of my daughters. My youngest and I seem to have the same types of triggers. Usually when my daughter has a meltdown it causes me to have one. But I have found that one of the easiest things for me is deep breathing when I start to feel triggered or she is melting down. It's hard, I'm not going to lie, but it helps take the edge off.
Heart Heather
Momma with SPD & 3 SPD Kiddo's <3
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AshMansMommy Offline
Newbie

Posts: 2
Joined: May 2012
#4
RE: Like Mother Like Son.

I guess my biggest question is how to handle my little guy once he is in meltdown mode. Like Heather mentioned..I too get major triggers when my son is melting down. i feel so horrible because I don't know how to help him once he reaches meltdown mode. He hurts himself, me, others....tries to break anything and everything. Throws everything in sight and screams and crys and is inconsolable. He says things that just confuse me like "ouch ouch ouch" when he isn't hurt or "go outside go outside go outside" and he doesn't actually want to go outside. He tends to hold on to one phrase and just repeat it constantly while crying. I feel so helpless. This normally goes on for an hour until he finally cries himself into exhaustion and then he curls up on the couch or in my bed for an hour or so snuggling/reading/watching some tv.

This has been happening at least 4-5 times a week. It takes all my strength in my body not to meltdown right along side him and in all honesty I have way to many times. Im at a loss, any help and advice would be MUCH appreciated.

I wanted to add too...his crying isn't just the normal typical toddler whining and crying. He is completely out of control, hyperventilating sometimes and just so past anyone calming him or helping him.
(This post was last modified: 05-28-2012, 01:20 AM by AshMansMommy.)
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beck7422 Offline
Regular

Posts: 342
Joined: Jun 2010
#5
RE: Like Mother Like Son.

Have you tried changing the environment around your son? For example: Turning off all the lights, changing the room temperature, putting a blanket that he can wrap himself in or hide in within his reach, turning off anything making sounds, and turning on music you know relaxes him.

Since he breaks and throws things, getting items out of his reach is something you can do for his and your safety.

Does he walk around when he melts down or does he stick to one small area?

Do you have a pillow or soft plush toy with a bit of weight that would be safe for him to throw?
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LynnNBoys Offline
Regular

Posts: 277
Joined: Dec 2010
#6
RE: Like Mother Like Son.

I'm in the same boat! I learned about my older son's SPD when he was in 1st grade. The more I learned, the more I thought, "That sounds like me!". I'm clumsy and have never been coordinated. I don't quite make it around corners and have bruises all the time from hitting my bed post. I have a lot of auditory issues, can't make sense of information I hear, I need to see it to understand. I have meltdowns when I'm in a big crowd for too lon I need alone time to recharge.

When my older son was at his worst, he had 5-8 meltdowns a day. I usually tried to talk to him in a low calm voice. Sometimes it helped to distract him with another activity. Watching a favorite show often calms him. He didn't usually throw things, but if he tried to hit me, someone else, or himself, I held him in a strong hug from behind. Every child is different but maybe there will be something that helps.

If my son was very agitated at bedtime, doing joint compressions calmed him.
Lynn Shy
mom to 2 boys, one avoider and one seeker
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