LAC you are an angel - thanks so much! (sorry I didn't get to the PM but you saw the reply first anyway )

It seems the Hellman's they get here has the TBHQ: http://www.unileverfoodsolutions.co.za/p...-25kg.html

But! WHOOHOO - one of our local stores stocks the Kraft Miracle Whip: http://www.woolworths.co.za/store/fragme...1000026494

So I'll try that and see how it goes. I'll feel better knowing there's none of the big 3 nasties, and will watch him for any reactions to the titanium dioxide- thanks for the heads-up.

tired mom - thanks so much. We do have OTs in SA, but everything is paid out of pocket. Government institutions are a joke, you either wait forever or they see you for 15mins, misdiagnose you, refer you to other people who take forever to see you and refer you back. So the only option really is the private one. It just get's pricey.
The schools are also difficult - we don't have 504s or IEPs here. The department of education has a blanket "inclusive education" policy but it's not yet law and no-one knows what it actually means for either party - how much help can parents and kids expect from the school, and what does government expect the school to do in cases where the school really can't offer much help - in rural schools the class sizes often surpass 50 to 60 kids per class, with little to no infrastructure and often unqualified teachers. It's a horrific situation for everyone.

Annnnd I'll stop there. I really don't like this country, and really want to get out, but that's a whole other story