Not sure how to begin.. I have for years only been able to eat one or two different types of food.. When I try different things I can't really tell if I like it or not. I have issues with buttons on my sleeves, if I chew gum I can't stop chewing one piece after another..My relationships socially always end up going bad.. This is just to name a few things. I'm here hoping to hear other peoples stories and maybe just get some support/ideas on how to deal...

Hi Nick! It's very nice to meet you. I'm sorry that you're having such a hard time right now. Believe me, I know where you're coming from; when I was having my worst "panic attacks," I had a horrible time eating, I've struggled with relationships for years, and if I start scratching something, I'll usually end up bleeding and want to scratch some more. And it humbles me to realize that I actually have an easier time with it than many people here. It sounds like you're really in a tough stage right now, so I hope that you are reaching out for support in other places, as well. We are a warm, helpful community, and we'll love talking to you and supporting you. We have a chat, which, if you want someone to really talk to quickly and in detail, would be a great place to start. And just about any of these introduction threads have stories that are liable to ring bells for you.

I hope, if you have any questions, that you will post them. We have a wide variety of people here with a wide variety of sensitivities or lack thereof who are liable to have experienced something similar and have some advice to offer. Also, we would love to know more about you in general. Do you have any hobbies? Do you enjoy gaming, reading, music? Any family that you spend time with? We'd love to know more!

I'm sorry I'm slow answering your post. I hope that we can help you out and (hopefully) make you feel more at home here.

Thank you for the reply. I really had parents that were alcoholics and didn't really even think about what I was dealing with or just basically blew it off as me being baby or whatever, so In my adult life I'm really finding it difficult to figure out how to just even make decisions on simple things because I'm not sure If I'm really feeling normal about them. That being said I have been working for a major ins company in Boston for 10 years and am now in a team leader postion. I love my job but sometimes the anixety and my almost constant need to either rub or twist my fingers or dig my toes into my shoes etc... I think prohibits me from really being successful. Hobbies - I love watching sports, I love girls I think they are so beautiful (everyone does right) and I really love to be able to just sit at a restuarant and have a drink and watch the game. What are some of the things you have had to deal with?

Believe me, I had similar experiences with my parents. Many of us here have. I would recommend that you take your senses seriously, because whether your responses are average or not, they still have an impact on your life. That alone is enough reason for you to take them seriously and, as needed, work with them.

Having said that, there are physical exercises and such that can assist you to improve how you can deal with intrusive feelings. Some of them you can find online to give you a start. Of course, if they help, then you don't have to worry about a diagnosis. However, if you want some guidance and the more complex exercises (and some personalized guidance, of course), you'll want to go to an Occupational Therapist. It would probably be partly covered on your insurance, which, I would assume because of your job, is quite excellent. And you probably already do a lot of coping behaviors that you don't even realize you do. I know I do (or did).

It sounds like you have become quite successful at work. I think it's wonderful that you enjoy it so much. I'm afraid it would be too high stress for me. On the other hand, I also can't imagine peacefully sitting at a restaurant that shows games on the big screen and stuff; those are also high stress things for me. But I can handle them, now that I am dealing with things better. I think girls are beautiful, too, but probably not quite the same way you do. And there are lots of sports fans on this site. I'll bet you'd find someone that likes whatever sports you watch. I know Dan's pretty fond of hockey, for instance.

As for my stuff, well, I'm mostly sensitive to everything, particularly balance issues (vestibular sense) and hearing issues. But I'm also very light sensitive, pretty touch sensitive (don't sneak up on me!), and I can't stand perfumes or chemicals, either to smell or on my skin. Other than that, I'm just your average opera singer with a redneck husband and a 2 year old son. lol I love to read, write, and talk to people online. I only found out that I had SPD in June, diagnosis in July, so I'm rather new at working with the therapies. Luckily, there are lots of people here that are much more experienced in these things, so there's lots of good advice here.

Sooooo... have you tried any types of therapies or coping mechanisms? It sounds like you have a few tactile issues. Do you have any other senses that really bother you? Or any questions about these things?

Thanks for the reply. I do have tactile issues, I try to hide all of these things in fear of people thinking I'm weird. I don't really know of any coping mechinisims, although like you said I'm sure I already do have some though I'm not aware. If you have any tips I'm open to them. Don't know if I mentioned this before but I am divorced and I never revealed this condition to my wife, but I feel like it contributd to the issues we were having in our marriage. I guess basically I'm at a crossroads in life - not sure if I'm better off alone or if I should pursue a relationship. If I do pursue another serious relationship I know it needs to be completely open and I need to be accepted for exactly what I am, hard to see a women being that accepting.... anyway

Let me guess. It goes something like this... if someone touches you unexpectedly, you flinch. When intimacy is involved, things can go south rather quickly with what might seem an innocuous touch to someone else. And when you get overwhelmed, you may get angry very quickly and unexpectedly, and the other person has no idea why.

Believe me, there are people out there who, while they might not understand, are willing to be accepting. My husband has freely admitted that he does not understand why, when he comes from behind to put his arms around me, I flinch. He has gotten very good at "stopping the presses" when something happens intimately that frightens or upsets me. And if I am suddenly being irrationally angry or upset for no seeming reason, he has his ways to get through to me and help me through it. I know that I have a great gift in him. But I also know that there are many more people in the world who are good, wonderful people who would be willing to accept my idiosyncrasies and yours. That's because even though ours may seem a big deal and often are, everyone has things that are their own issues. I don't want to push you one way or another towards a relationship decision; that is far too big a decision for a total stranger to pretend they have the answer to. But don't let the thought that someone might not want to "put up" with you make you chuck the whole idea out the window. Believe me, I was firmly single for over ten years before my husband found me. Yeah, he pushed his way into my little insular life without my permission. lol Believe me, I'm glad he did.

Tips? Well, I know a lot of people whose problems are primarily tactile get good results from the Wilbarger Protocol, sometimes just called brushing, but that is something you'd have to learn from an OT. I have a lot of luck with rolling and bouncing on a therapy ball. They are relatively inexpensive, don't take up a lot of room, and can double as a chair or an exercise device. I find that the deep pressure I get from rolling on it helps me calm down. Since I'm also very sensitive to sound, I find driving very stressful. I often wear ear buds (the kind that go in the ear, not sit outside it), whether I play music or not. Bouncing on a trampoline helps some, but since I have stability issues, that's not really my thing. You might enjoy it, though. Many people swear by weighted blankets or vests. I have to have very firm pillows, or I constantly feel like I'll roll off them. If you have eye sensitivities, some sunglasses can be very helpful, or even Irlen lenses if you have serious eye difficulties or reading issues.

My biggest suggestion, though, is to look around, see some "lists" of things that people use to help themselves. Some things work better for some folks than others, mostly because there is such a wide variance in each person's amount of sensitivity or lack thereof. Don't be afraid to try one thing at a time and, if you see no improvement, give it up and try something else. A therapy ball is a pretty basic one that almost everyone has, but you might find something else you like better. Be willing to experiment. Even OT's sometimes have to try a few things before they can really peg what works best for you. Believe me, the relief you feel when your body is getting the necessary input to let go a bit is well worth that time and effort.

Wow you are so right about the firmness of things like pillows etc... I really need firm textures. What I find helps me the most I guess is music, especially specific artists, Eminem and your going to laugh but Taylor Swift...I really do love being in love so I don't want to give up on relationships but as I get older I realize I need someone that truly Gets me and with spd that is hard to find. I really appreciate your input and your continued attention thank you.

*hugs* Hey, lots of women are accepting, You just gotta find them. x3 I'm very accepting of "different" things, I judge no one based on their abilities/disabilities, or whatever else. There's plenty of us out there. Just dont hide from us, be truthful from the start and all will be better.

Take care NickB, and hang out around the Chat if you feel up to it. :3 I'm often around, just say my name (or anyone else's) and if we're there we'll respond

I know what you mean about loving being in love. But what I've found even better than being "in love" is being in a committed relationship with someone I've chosen to continue to love after the glow is gone. Sure, it's hard work. And yeah, we have to work to understand and accept one another. And as you said, it's vital that everything is above board and honest. It's worth the time and dedication to find someone who is like that. When times are hard, nothing is better. And when times are good, the triumph is sweet.

You know, every one of us has a different artist or style of music that gets them better. I get a lot out of the Indigo Girls, Nina Simone, Dead Can Dance, Metallica, some good opera singers (it has to be in tune!), and Chopin nocturnes can all do great for me in different moods/situations. That's why I'm beginning to get addicted to my mp3 player (suggested by Dan, thank you!) and my earbuds that go in the ear. My boss loves Taylor Swift; he calls her his guilty pleasure. lol There's really not a right or wrong answer there. And giving yourself a certain amount of ear candy for your stimulation is very helpful!

You know, there are places that make very firm pillows that are long enough to wrap all the way around your body. If that is comforting to you, it may be worth the investment. I'm very tempted myself, but we have too much in our bed already with my son in the middle. lol (Yes, we're trying to get him in his own bed. We'll see how that goes... Daddy is fighting it! lol) And if you like super firm pillows, you might like buckwheat hull pillows. I used one of those for years and loved it. I would sometimes drape it over my shoulders for long drives or when I sat for long periods of time... it's very relaxing.

I'm glad I was able to reach out for you. I know it's hard sometimes to find someone to listen. I hope you won't give up on reaching out and trying; there are other hands willing to find yours, if you look. The most important thing is to not pull back before they get a chance to reach for you.