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A dream...
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Sila Offline
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Posts: 115
Joined: Oct 2010
#1
A dream...

This is a dream that I just had this morning...it seemed like it went on for hours. I felt it was important enough to write down- I feel that if I remember a dream in detail, it's meant to be remembered and should be written down.

------------------------

I tried to go into the library for a book (apparently about dyspraxia as I later learned). As I’m exiting the library my normal path to exit is blocked or closed, so I cut through an already made path in the woods. Somewhere along there I get “taken away” by some big hairy creature, who didn’t even say anything that I can remember. I’m forced to be “imprisoned” of sorts in his camp-site like area, and a paper that I guess I was handed says until age 22, or 22 years. I start to cry because I think of all the things back home that I’m missing, and who’s going to miss me and worry about me, everything. I’m not comforted but I’m reassured somehow, told that it’s not going to be so bad or something. There wasn’t a lot of dialog at this point.

At one point in the next “scene” of sorts, a huge tree is actually falling right where I’m standing- and is heading toward me. Some other kind of tree, that’s supposed to protect me, stops the falling one from hurting me. I’m told to see it and realize that it’s here to protect me.

There’s a point here where I look around and I see I’m not the only kid around. There are witches and wizards around, as well as regular teenagers. I ask the creature if we’re allowed to do magic, and I suppose he says yes within limits. So… I try to do some to pass some time away, to try and have a bit of fun. I can’t seem to do it or get along with the other kids, so I walk away at some point alone again. There are other kids around, but they’re confusing. They’re in pink clothing, assumingly your typical preppy teenage girl. I already feel very dirty and soiled at this point, the scratches and dirt has combined on my skin to feel very nasty. But there’s no consolation for that… There are no showers, nor baths, nor watering holes to clean up in. I’m barefoot, I don’t know if I’m wearing clothes, and I’m dirty. Dirt makes me feel weird and bad…

Some point after, I ask about some of the rules of this place. I’m still upset that I have to be here, but I’m wondering if it’s anything like jail (since it feels like one) - where good behavior can get you off early. I’m not told anything overly specific, but at some point I’m told (or led to believe) that I can get off either 9 years early, or when I’m 18. Those two numbers stick out for some reason. I cling to this thought as hope that I can get out before too much damage is done in the real, outside world.

Everything here isn’t terrible. We’re not really mistreated, but we’re not well taken care of either. The only food I remember being given is a banana, of which I can’t eat the ends to.

During the next part, I come to realize that I actually have a dog here- a small little beagle or perhaps a Bernese mountain dog puppy. I’m allowed to walk with the Creature, who is still unnamed, as we walk the dogs on a short leash. I’m also on some kind of a hold back, but I don’t know if it’s a physical leash or not. As we’re walking, we start discussing things.

A few things that he brought up… were me. He was surprised by me- I hit more “developmental milestones” than anyone else, and quicker. I hoped that meant I could get out quicker than the others. He was confused though, because I was much calmer than the rest…but I also couldn’t do something so simple that everyone else could. That confused him. He didn’t understand why I had trouble in trying to care for myself, such as dressing or bathing I guess. I had trouble with my balance. I tried to explain that "right before you got me, I was actually going to the library to pick up a book about dyspraxia- because I thought that I had it." He tried to explain why he captured me… but I couldn’t even hear what he was clearly saying. My attention was on the puppy in front of me, because they were bouncing around cutely. As we walked back to the ‘camp’ area, I think I asked whether I could get out early…but I wasn’t given a reply.

As I got back to the ‘camp’ area, one of the “helpers” started to explain that things were going to start costing money. Dog walks would be a dollar; a “guardian angel” for them would be more. Food for the dogs started to cost money… but I had none, and no way of getting any. I started to cry here… without my dogs, I am nothing. I’m not happy, at all, without a dog that I can hold and talk to when I’m down. I just cried, and looked for a solution…

And that’s where I woke up. I’m awake… a few tears are actually falling, and I roll over and cling to my boyfriend- glad that he’s here for me to cling to, and relieved to know that it’s just a dream. Some details of this dream won’t leave me, but are hard to put into words. Such as what the surrounding area looked like…or what this creature looked like. I don’t know the origins of it, nor do I know the reasoning why…
<Mako>I see one sila Tongue caring loving girl whos a lil shy + scared on the inside but has a giant heart ^-^
Heart
--
Highly suspected/Being evaluated for: ADHD & Autism.
Also have SPD, GAD, and an annoying speech impediment.
(This post was last modified: 10-29-2010, 01:46 PM by Sila.)
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Dani Offline
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Posts: 261
Joined: Apr 2010
#2
RE: A dream...

Wow, that is a pretty odd dream, gotta admit. I tend to have a lot of odd scary ones myself, and can usually remember them about as well as this.

As for this particular dream, you are in a very rough patch of your life right now, and this seems to have combined many of the elements of which you are experiencing. I'm no dream interpreter, but oh well, just for fun I'll give it a shot Tongue.

>Library book on dyspraxia
Obvious correlation to current events in your life.

>The camp out in the woods where you are trapped
Lets suggest this is the world of SPD, which you are now aware you have, and are trapped in a body that has it. You seek to get out as soon as possible, but you realize this is not short term. Things like the tree falling are the dangers you realize of living with SPD, while the lack of food and appreciation is the realization of all the things SPD has denied you of. Yet there are guardians for those dangers, and there is a light in the tunnel for you, the puppy. You now realize that puppy (your recovery from SPD) is achievable, but you fear there is no way you will be able to get it.

How's that for deep assumptions? Tongue

Seriously though, thanks for posting this. I agree that writing out your bad dreams might just be very helpful for you, as well as for others who have experienced many bizarre or even similar dreams. Perhaps I should share some of mine sometime Smile.
Hi, welcome to SPD Support! Have a free cyber hug! hug
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