1. What brings you here?
My husband and I were HS sweethearts and have been married 14 years and we have 2 kids a girl 8 and a boy 7. Our family recently decided for several reasons to see a psychologist to address concerns with our 7 yr son. I would describe him as quirky and challenging. After filling out a 24 pg report on his quirks my husband and I met with a psychologist.

Not only did he mention we will test to confirm Sensory integration disorder or also known as SPD, but I watched my husband grow more in more in shock for what the Dr seemed to describe him exactly. We not only had an ahaa moment regarding our son but now my Husband now seems to have a better understanding of what he has experienced his whole life.

We just found this out and my husband has been dealing with anxiety and depression as well as many other symptoms too long to mention here.

HELP! WHAT DOES AN ADULT DO NEXT TO HELP?

2. What is your relations to someone with SPD? Do you have it? a child of yours? Do you treat SPD kids as a professionaL? My son is in great hands with drs. and therapy in the same office. my daughter has a learning disability which we are now considering apart of this as well similar to Auditory dysfunction.

My husband has recently agreed reluctantly to see a therapist, however we now have a very clear understanding that this affects him as well. The concern we have is everything we read says adults have learned to cope and avoid, but he wants to help this. What else can we do? He argues with my son all the time their relationship isn't very strong because they are both strong willed. As a mom and wife how can I help them to handle each other to avoid both of their triggers?

Example: My son threw a fit cause we did not pick the Christmas tree he wanted. My husband reacted VERY angry at my sons fit. Needless to say we left the store.

PLEASE HELP, WE CAN"T GO ON LIKE THIS!

3. Share a little of your journey if you'd like.
My SON: throw fits when we make or have unexpected changes, doesn't like certain food textures. refuses to wear a bike helmet. Loves touch, loves to spin and play rough, runs awkward, he's unbalanced and is clumsy.
School is a struggle academically, he was making better grades now he struggles in reading writing and math.
My HUSBAND: A Former Marine...bites his nails...almost gone.. no nail bed at all. seems angry at nothing. doesn't like loud noises. is an introvert and dislikes social settings unless drinking.. not substance abuse though. Seems depressed, high anxiety, fear of failure, can't keep a job. doesn't recognize when he's hungry. would go without eating for days. He also smells everything! His teeth are almost totally rotten. He's sarcastic and socially awkward. Some would say he is a jerk. He doesn't think of others and their feelings. Often laughs at me in the middle of an argument.

The problem my husband and I argue about how to best discipline our kids. He is either quiet and says nothing or is completely over the top. Which I now recognize that is because he is dealing with loud voices and sensory overload.

4. Is there any immediate help you need?
We are seeking a psychologist and OT with my son, but what about my husband??

5. SPD doesn't run your life! What are you or your child's gifts? Interests?

My son is very creative and is a pretty good dancer. He is so thoughtful and sweet.
My husband is an amazing partner and helper. He helps the house and family in so many ways. We are big Christians in our church and he wants to find help.


6. What do you like to do in your spare time? Any hobbies or interests?
We love to travel. We spend the most time just the 4 of us and we have a boat and all of our spare time is on the boat. Which seems to sooth everyone.

Please let us know what you think. How can I be a good mom and wife to my family struggling with this? Where do we go from here to help my husband?

Thank you!!!

OT is an option for adults too! I'm not sure if you realized that. I didn't get any occupational therapy until I was 23.

Researching is a place to start. Implementing a sensory diet, even if you don't go through an OT, is likely an important thing to do for your husband. When our needs aren't met, its harder for us to cope. So, figure out how to appropriately meet needs is likely the first step.

(12-12-2013, 10:20 PM)Tuttleturtle Wrote: OT is an option for adults too! I'm not sure if you realized that. I didn't get any occupational therapy until I was 23.

Researching is a place to start. Implementing a sensory diet, even if you don't go through an OT, is likely an important thing to do for your husband. When our needs aren't met, its harder for us to cope. So, figure out how to appropriately meet needs is likely the first step.

Thank you for the suggestions. I have a enjoyed reading your blog as well.
Did you go to a psychologist to get official diagnosis, or go straight to an OT?

I was diagnosed with an ASD by a neuropsychologist, and SPD by an OT