You described my daughter who is 6 now. I sooooooooooo can relate but honestly I say to everyone don't limit yourself. If you had a child that was in a wheelchair would you not take them places. My daughter has tons of meltdowns.. I know her cues though and usually can talk to her before she erupts and sometimes I can't . One time she did this in the school parking lot. The principal had the audacity to say you must have been so embarrassed (this was before I even knew what SPD was) I told her no I was not embarrassed I was concerned and trying to figure out how to help her so she would calm down.. Lets face it people are going to judge people are going to misunderstand but you know that there is an real issue so don't let it hold you back. But do prepare yourself. I think as far as OT goes we have not gotten into it that much yet but my OT has helped with behavior already alot. She told me that kids at this age do not see themselves and they see others more and the way to get them to see how their behavior is not hmmm proper is you have to really control your reactions from voice tone, to facial and body language... So when my little princess starts up... I calm down and say hold on touch her arm to make sure she focuses on me.. I ask if she thinks mommy is angry, She says no, I ask am I yelling she says no, Am I kicking she or jumping around, she says no am I saying not nice things.. She says no then I flip it and ask if she is doing it...It is amazing but she actually calms down. Every child is different but that really helped me with her behavior. Also the normal things that bother us like hunger fatigue and being uncomfortable I need to make sure these things are under control because that is an automatic path to meltdowns. We all get cranky when those things happen normally but for them it is so much worse so she said to make sure she is always well fed, well rested and that before we leave the house her clothes are comfortable. Those were all suggestions all from OT and from one visit. They heard a meltdown of Kays and I was almost in tears so they know how hard it has been for me. She also wants to address her sense of control over her enviornment. She can be bossy and very dominant but it is a sense of controlling what happens around her to protect herself from unexpected things... Yes my OT wants to work on handwriting and other challenges but for me in school the behavior is my biggest challenge... I would so be upset like u if they just focused on the technical aspects yes they need work but there has to be work on all ends.

Not sure what everyone means about biomedical solutions will look into it. I really hope things go well for you I know how draining those meltdowns can be... Hope any of what I wrote can help. Hugs to you and your daughter